What Third Pregnancies are Really Like

Third pregnancies are great but they aren’t always easy! This humorous take on a third pregnancies will have you laughing out loud!!

I sat down to write today and my content calendar said “Pregnancy update”. This was planned a while ago, and I knew I’d be 18 weeks along, so just about half way there.

I made some notes to talk about my first trimester, talk about how I’m handling 2 little kids while I’m pregnant, and talk about my goals for the remainder of the pregnancy.

That was cute. (cue major eye roll)

Yesterday I just flat out refused to get out of bed until lunch. Because I’m sick all. the. time.

I’m tired all. the. time.

My back hurts, I’m uncomfortable, I’m losing weight because I can’t eat, and I needed a break.

Spoiler alert: I’m miserable. And now I’m at the point where I’m making everyone around me miserable. Because, you know, misery loves company.

So instead of trying to do a cutesie little pregnancy update, I decided to talk about the realities of being pregnant for a third time and the differences between my first and third pregnancies.

It’s time to get real, ya’ll.

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Diet:

1st pregnancy: Eat healthy and nutritious for the baby, stay away from sugary treats as much as possible

2nd pregnancy: Try to eat decent, not too much sugar

3rd pregnancy: Eat what you can keep down, baby will probably be a giant sugar cube with arms and legs

Exercise:

1st pregnancy: There’s no reason to stop exercising if it feels good, slow down when appropriate, stay fit to prepare for a natural labor.

2nd pregnancy: Take walks when you can, get fresh air, squats will help baby stay head down, wear a Fit Bit to track steps for the day.

3rd pregnancy: I buckled two kids into car seats and wrestled the dog for the sausage I dropped on the floor, close enough.

Sleep:

1st pregnancy: Sleep and rest as often as possible, cut back on duties at work and social outings, this is a time to be resting and preparing for baby.

2nd pregnancy: Nap when you can, go to bed early. Thank God for body pillows, amiright???

3rd pregnancy: Hahahahahaha

Maternity clothes:

1st pregnancy: Try to stay stylish and work appropriate but embrace a growing belly and don’t be afraid to show it off

2nd pregnancy: It’s ok to wear maternity pants earlier than before.

3rd pregnancy: I never put them away from the second pregnancy.

p.s. check out these killer maternity underwear, you can thank me later…..

Names:

1st pregnancy: We had a boy and a girl name picked out before we knew the gender

2nd pregnancy: We had a short list of names before we knew the gender, and we used a cute nickname until we decided

3rd pregnancy: We call the baby “the new one”, no names as of yet.

Pictures:

1st pregnancy: Take pictures periodically to show the progress of a growing belly

2nd pregnancy: Take one picture so you have proof you really did birth this child

3rd pregnancy: ***as of date there is no photographic evidence of this pregnancy***

The Pregnancy:

1st pregnancy: It’s wonderful! I feel great and even when I don’t I am happy because I know it’s a small sacrifice for my child.

2nd pregnancy: Meh, I don’t feel great but I guess I’m hanging in there

3rd pregnancy: I’m miserable and I make sure my husband knows it. You will suffer too!

Related: The 6 Best Tips for Helping with Morning Sickness

How I See My Husband:

1st pregnancy: I can’t believe we’re going to be parents!! I love you so much, you’re going to be an incredible dad.

2nd pregnancy: I wish you knew the sacrifices I’m making right now, but you make your own sacrifices too. Will you rub my back?

3rd pregnancy: You. You did this to me. Get. me. chocolate.

Doctor Appointments:

1st pregnancy: Write down several questions for each appointment, take notes and read ALL the literature your doctor gives you. Do everything the doctor says without question, they know what’s best.

2nd pregnancy: Go to the doctor’s appointments, do most of what they say, read some of the literature.

3rd pregnancy: At your first appointment ask if you really have to come every month since you literally just did this last year. See doctor’s disapproving face, go to most of the appointments.

The Birth Plan:

1st pregnancy: I’m going to try to go as long as I can without any medication and I’m hoping for a vaginal delivery (ended in an emergency c-section)

2nd pregnancy: I’m planning a completely natural VBAC (ended in c-section)

3rd pregnancy: How early can we schedule the c-section?

***full disclosure, that last one was a joke for the sake of the article; I was planning to have a VBA2C my entire third pregnancy and with the support of my husband I was able to do so, which you can read about here!***

Related: 8 Best Tips for Recovery from A C-Section

Anti-Nausea Medications:

1st pregnancy: I don’t want to take anything more than vitamins, even if the doctor says it’s ok I will avoid it unless absolutely necessary

2nd pregnancy: I’m going to tough it out if I can, but I’ll take meds that are safe when I need them so I can keep up with my preschooler

3rd pregnancy: At my first appointment I told the Dr. I would be needing “the same drugs you people give Princess Kate”. I take them every day. I’m pretty sure they are made of unicorn tears, they’re that good.

All The Sacrifices:

1st pregnancy: Sacrifice? I’m happy to give up wine, deli meat, sushi and anything else for my child. It’s a pleasure. Besides, it’s only 9 months!

2nd pregnancy: Awww man, no wine again?! Oh well, it will be worth it. Besides it’s only 9 months.

3rd pregnancy: Text friends to see how much wine you could have before it hurts the baby.            (***relax, it was only hypothetical, I didn’t actually drink any wine***)

The Anticipation:

1st pregnancy: I’m so excited to meet this baby, but I’m going to savor every second of pregnacy

2nd pregnancy: I’m just excited to meet the baby

3rd pregnancy: Are we done yet?

No matter what, I’m incredibly excited for this baby to come. We are grateful that God has blessed us with another gift and we cannot wait to meet him! But that doesn’t mean that pregnancy is easy.

Pregnancy is can be one of the most difficult and physically demanding times in a woman’s life and I’m just trying to find a little humor along the way.